2008-01-26T09:53:00.000-08:00

These are my opinions. Do not write and bitch me out about my opinions. dammit

1. White text on black background.

Also called "reverse type", this form of graphic design (snork) gives me and a great many others a major headache and when I look away from the screen, I can hardly see anything. I don't know what it is, but I see younger men doing this a lot. Dark backgrounds and tiny tiny text in white or some version of white (eggshell, cream, vanilla, whatever).

My resolution for 2008: I will not read a single blog that is done in reverse type. (MySpace is crowded with this crap, by the way.)

2. Flashing flashing flashing.

Seizure alert! I hate that crap. Banner ads, icons, little angels that turn into devils....maybe some of it is forced upon the blogger by the hosting site....I'd move if that were the case. I did move because of that, and I'm not saying where it was.

3. Every space is used.

Some home pages are so jammed with text and images that I just click and am gone. Information overload is everywhere, I won't have it on my own computer. It also behooves a blogger to remember that those with a slow connection never do see that page. At all. Lucky bastards.

4. The website or blog is unclear.

Is it a politics kind of person? Is this a memory site for Mom? Is this a school teacher's take on her latest class?

I should know this stuff within seconds of logging onto a site. I should not have to look around for what this person's "mission" is in taking up webspace.

5. Spelling!

For God's sake, use spell check. If you don't have it, copy and paste your text to a Word document, run spell check, then copy and paste it back. I forgive typos, I do not forgive carelessness.

6. Grammar.

Don't even get me started. I need a whole other Listmania to cover my gripes on grammar.

7. Other fouling of the written word.

What is it with people writing only in lower case letters? I found at least ten blogs or websites that use no capitalization whatsoever. And to this, as an English major, I say in a show of rare but honest dismay: "WTF?????"

8. Blogging blather.

Then again, I spent a whole hour reading this teenaged girl's daily life. I kid you not: her honest daily life, from getting up, taking a shower and going to school. For a solid week, nothing happened to her. I kept reading. Finally, finally, Jared asked her to skate with him on Friday night at RossCar's Rollaway and I felt nearly cheered.

But that is an hour of my life I'm not getting back, folks.

Sure, you can blog the minutia of your life. I just really hate it.

9. The Can-of-Worms Syndrome

Sweet Jesus, what some people put on the internet! A father who just announced he's gay, an unwanted pregnancy of a friend (who is named in the blog), a menstrual cycle, a long explanation of a colonoscopy (complete with pictures of the blogger's innards), telling about the intervention planned for a brother, describing in excruciating detail a miscarriage.....

And it's just like me to sit here and read it. I'm a voyeur every bit as much as the next person but I find that later, I feel kind of.....icky. Because I know a whole lot more about that person than I should. I even know his/her name, city, school.....not smart to publish all that.

10. The Various Mutual Masturbation Societies

That's how I see it. Twenty people all blog and they all link to one another. None of them are outstanding, all of them mention each other continually, do they even need the rest of us? "Kelly" has links to Ashley, Brenda, Bryan, Colby, Greg....and they have links back to her. They really admire each other's opinions. They are high school seniors or college freshmen.

(The worst was a group of "moms" who did this; I felt shame. Just pure shame. That was a group that could've included me, but I'm ethical enough to avoid that shit; note I do not use blogrolls. If I want to pimp your blog, I do it in an entire entry.)

10 Cardinal Blogging Sins